The idea you have to punish yourself to reach a “healthy weight” is everywhere.
(But having “punish” and “healthy” in the same sentence doesn’t make sense!)
Magazines, conversations with friends and your favorite romantic comedies are filled with throw-away comments (like the one above, from The Devil Wears Prada). These diet rules, tips and tricks spread, reinforce and normalize the message that losing weight is all about:
- DISCIPLINE
- WILLPOWER
- EXTREME MEASURES
And I completely bought into that message.And I completely bought into that message.
I learned I should only eat fruit before noon.
Just eat the white of an egg. Chew food 10 times before swallowing.
Stop eating after 8 pm. And so on.
But I could never follow these restrictions for long.
After days of feeling too hungry to think about anything else, I’d end up overeating.
10 extra pounds quickly became 30 which I lost and regained over and over again.
For 10 years I was either “on” a diet (starving myself) or “off” a diet (bingeing).
I also spent thousands of dollars on symbolic jewelry, day planners, etc. to mark the start of a new diet.
And each time I believed my next diet would change everything. But I always ended up breaking my diet.
Instead of blaming my weight-loss method, I blamed myself.
Shame led to secrecy and I isolated myself with misinformation…
All those years I thought I was patching together a comprehensive method to lose weight.
But in reality all this diet info made me:
→ Scared to eat regular meals. I thought:
If I’m this big by only eating rice cakes and diet coke most of the time, imagine how much bigger I’ll be if I eat a full dinner?
→ Wreck my knees by running up to 10 miles a day (and further if I was trying to make up for overeating).
→ Afraid I’d never lose weight.
Here I am back when eating a raisin (unplanned) would ruin the whole day.
Trying to stick to my diet perfectly got me caught in the starve-binge-purge cycle.
I started skipping school, dropping out of sports I loved and canceling Friday night plans with friends so I could plan a new diet.
No matter the cost, I couldn’t stop dieting because I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin. (I hated the way I looked.)
Here I am back when eating a raisin (unplanned) would ruin the whole day.
Trying to stick to my diet perfectly got me caught in the starve-binge-purge cycle.
I started skipping school, dropping out of sports I loved and canceling Friday night plans with friends so I could plan a new diet.
No matter the cost, I couldn’t stop dieting because I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin.
(I hated the way I looked.)
You’re here because you feel like you’ve wrecked the day when you eat white bread instead of brown (even though there weren’t other options!) AND you’ve…
Wasted time (years!), money (on diets, new starts and bingeing) and talent (you’re not doing your best at school or work because you’re either hungry, worrying about what you ate or trying to make up for overeating).
Punished yourself for breaking your diet. Throwing out your clothes or burning your diaries to draw a line in the sand before starting a new diet.
Taken LESS risks and “watered dead plants” (people who treat you badly) because you don’t trust yourself with food so you don’t trust yourself with anything.
Kept secrets. I used to tell people the cuts on my knuckles were burns from my curling iron. Or laugh so no one would worry when I replied, “Oh, I have no idea why I have a blood-shot eye!”
Felt hopeless. Like you’re at rock bottom and don’t even care about your weight. You’re tired of living a double life and just want to feel normal and stop worrying about everything you eat. But you have no idea what to do next because you’ve been dieting as long as you can remember.
The good news? You’re ready to get FREEDOM from food obsession so you don’t miss anymore opportunities.
On my 24th birthday, I finally said:
after 10 looong
YEARS of:
wondering if I had a slow metabolism
weighing myself all the time
checking how BIG I looked in every reflective surface
being ashamed of my extra weight
agonizing over what I should or shouldn’t eat
feeling GUILTY or DEPRIVED no matter what I ate
dreading social situations that involved food
skipping a meal OR doing extra exercise if I thought I ate too much
counting calories and obsessing over food labels
feeling hungry, even in the middle of the night
OVEREATING between diets
punishing myself for not having the willpower to stick to my diet
thinking I’d struggle with my weight for the REST of my life
living NOWHERE near my potential because I was preoccupied…
after 10 looong
YEARS of:
wondering if I had a slow metabolism
weighing myself all the time
checking how BIG I looked in every reflective surface
being ashamed of my extra weight
agonizing over what I should or shouldn’t eat
feeling GUILTY or DEPRIVED no matter what I ate
dreading social situations that involved food
skipping a meal OR doing extra exercise if I thought I ate too much
counting calories and obsessing over food labels
feeling hungry, even in the middle of the night
OVEREATING between diets
punishing myself for not having the willpower to stick to my diet
thinking I’d struggle with my weight for the REST of my life
living NOWHERE near my potential because I was preoccupied…
I stopped dieting.
After 10 years of starving myself but STILL barely being able to do up the zipper of my biggest pair of pants, I finally decided to start eating like I gave a damn about my body.
The result? I lost 30 lbs and food became a non-issue.
Being able to slip into my soon-to-be favorite jeans (the ones I bought in my “dream size” to motivate me to lose weight)… shocked me. I was eating more and exercising less!
And — the best part — because I never go hungry, I stopped thinking about food. It literally felt like someone let me out of jail. I could concentrate on teaching my Grade 5 class (and fell in love with the kids), meet Alex in Covent Garden for dinner after work (and enjoy the meal) and walk down the street without trying to catch my reflection, to see how “big” I looked.
After 10 years of starving myself but STILL barely being able to do up the zipper of my biggest pair of pants, I finally decided to start eating like I gave a damn about my body.
The result? I lost 30 lbs and food became a non-issue.
Being able to slip into my soon-to-be favorite jeans (the ones I bought in my “dream size” to motivate me to lose weight)… shocked me. I was eating more and exercising less!
And — the best part — because I never go hungry, I stopped thinking about food. It literally felt like someone let me out of jail. I could concentrate on teaching my Grade 5 class (and fell in love with the kids), meet Alex in Covent Garden for dinner after work (and enjoy the meal) and walk down the street without trying to catch my reflection, to see how “big” I looked.
For the first time, I felt free and have stayed that way for 25+ years.
Which gave me so much more time to throw myself into the important things in life, like finding out who I am—separate from my weight.
Which gave me so much more time to throw myself into the important things in life, like finding out who I am—separate from my weight.
I fell in love with art.
Sure, I enjoy a good gallery full of the greats.
But… the kind of art I’m talking about is the sun mosaic (above) that Alex and I made out of broken plates, and:
Hover over the above squares to see what they’re about.
I’m all about salvaging things that are full of potential and giving them a chance to bounce back—whether it’s art, animals, all the orchids we’ve found abandoned on dog walks (they rebloom every year!) and helping women – like YOU – get control of your relationship with food.
'It's just not that complicated!'
Thank you for sharing knowledge that changed my life. You’ve helped me get healthy after an intense period of confusion and suffering. The solution to reaching a healthy weight just isn’t as complicated as we’re taught to believe. And, I’ve already lost 20 pounds!
'I've already lost 20 pounds!'
Thank you for sharing knowledge that changed my life. Your voice and message has helped me get healthy after an intense period of confusion and suffering. The solution to reaching a healthy weight just isn’t as complicated as we’re taught to believe.
'I’ve already lost 20 pounds!'
Thank you for sharing knowledge that changed my life. Your voice and message has helped me get healthy after an intense period of confusion and suffering. The solution to reaching a healthy weight just isn’t as complicated as we’re taught to believe.
What I’ve learned from coaching Harvard educated lawyers, leading doctors, and incredible moms…
The solution to finding your HAPPY weight isn’t as complicated as you’ve been taught to believe. Full stop.
You’re already a high-achiever.
And you’re ready to focus on what you’re good at — and not the calories in the dressing you just had on your salad at lunch.
But if you’re used to putting everything into reaching your goals, simplifying your weight-loss method will feel wrong. You need to understand that reaching and maintaining your healthy weight isn’t about restricting food, punishing yourself and ignoring hunger and cravings.
The secret to lasting weight loss is being kind to your body.
I help women smash the system that keeps them punishing themselves. Start unlocking your HAPPY weight so you can discover who you are without disordered eating.
The solution to finding your HAPPY weight isn’t as complicated as you’ve been taught to believe. Full stop.
You’re already a high-achiever.
And you’re ready to focus on what you’re good at — and not the calories in the dressing you just had on your salad at lunch.
But if you’re used to putting everything into reaching your goals, simplifying your weight-loss method will feel wrong. You need to understand that reaching and maintaining your healthy weight isn’t about restricting food, punishing yourself and ignoring hunger and cravings.
The secret to lasting weight loss is being kind to your body.
I help women smash the system that keeps them punishing themselves. Start unlocking your HAPPY weight so you can discover who you are without disordered eating.
'I don’t have to be so hard on myself to lose weight.'
That was my aha moment from Kelly’s book. It truly speaks to me.
'I don’t have to be so hard on myself to lose weight'
That was my aha moment from Kelly’s book. It truly speaks to me.
'I don’t have to be so hard on myself to lose weight'
That was my aha moment from Kelly’s book. It truly speaks to me.
